Hard Evidence That Kids Give The Absolute Worst Gifts, But Hey, It’s The Thought That Counts

Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, and birthdays are supposed to be some of the best days of the year for parents. They are the one day a year where it’s all about you, and not about your kids. But of course, kids can’t let it be that simple. They have the best of intentions, but gifts and cards from kids can take a weird turn.

I know that parents are selfless and will always appreciate any gift they get, but let’s be honest — most presents from kids are terrible. One little girl wanted to give her dad a thoughtful photo frame, and it somehow turned into the weirdest Father’s Day gift. If you’re a parent, please consider increasing your child’s allowance so they can afford a candle or some chocolate instead of having to rely on any of these gifts.

Worse Than When You Accidentally Call Your Teacher Mom

This middle school student gave his teacher a flower, which is weird enough, but it turned out to be one of those flowers with a thong wrapped inside.

Photo credit: MrWrigleyField / Reddit
Photo credit: MrWrigleyField / Reddit

If this doesn’t cross the teacher-student boundary line, I don’t know what does. It goes to show why you never buy a gift from a gas station.

What Card Company Would Do This To The Fathers Of The World

I’ve got a bone to pick with whatever card company decided this was a good idea. You’re literally asking for kids to fart on cards and present it to their fathers like it’s a gift.

Photo credit: Imgur
Photo credit: Imgur

You know that it’s the moms of the world buying these cards as payback for the fact their sofa has never smelled fresh.

Not The Chia Pet You Expected

Mother’s Day and Father’s Day gifts from preschools are always hit or miss. Sometimes the preschools try to go above and beyond and create some weird homemade chia pet.

Photo credit: @TragicAllyHere / Twitter
Photo credit: @TragicAllyHere / Twitter

Next time, can we all just agree to stick to having the child turn their palm prints into a butterfly with a pre-written poem underneath.

Don’t Drop Your Cane In The Final Loop

Happy birthday, dad! You’re one year closer to being violently thrown off the end of the waterslide into the black abyss.

Photo credit: @brian_sack / Twitter
Photo credit: @brian_sack / Twitter

I think relating life to a waterslide is honestly a little tame. I’d consider life a rollercoaster. And when you become a parent, you get stuck in an endless cycle of corkscrews.

Be Grateful For The Little Things

If you think about it, this is kind of sweet. Aren’t we all just happy that the people we love in life haven’t died yet? All of us are too politically correct to say it.

Photo credit: Reddit
Photo credit: Reddit

Thankfully, kids have no filters and will write whatever they want. They’ll even manage to do the proper spelling of ‘you’re’ while they’re at it.

He’s A Medic, FYI

It’s the thought that counts, but this definitely isn’t one of those gifts you can put on your desk at work.

Photo credit: Medical_Mercenary / Reddit
Photo credit: Medical_Mercenary / Reddit

Even though he can’t bring it to work, this dad is morally obligated to leave this photo frame front and center at home for anyone who comes over to see.

You Get An ‘A’ For Effort

Kids making cards to send to veterans across America is a sweet idea until you have one of them writing stuff like this.

Photo credit: uscmissinglink / Reddit
Photo credit: uscmissinglink / Reddit

I’m sure the veteran who received the card had a good laugh about it, but maybe it’s a reminder that adults need to proofread any gifts that kids make.

What Happens When You Let The Kids Make Father’s Day Breakfast

We all know that anytime mom gets breakfast in bed from the kids, it is dad’s cooking skills that are actually being put to work. But whatever mom decided to let her kids run wild in the kitchen must have known this would be the outcome.

Photo credit: CaptainFiddler / Reddit
Photo credit: CaptainFiddler / Reddit

We love when kids are creative until your breakfast is on the line.

But Mother’s Day Breakfast Might Be Even Worse

At least that Father’s Day breakfast looked like the kids put some effort into it. This Mother’s Day breakfast screams “I have no idea what I’m doing.”

Photo credit: Robbieworld / Reddit
Photo credit: Robbieworld / Reddit

Bread and cheese are a delicacy in France, but a stale croissant and half-eaten cheese string aren’t what mom had in mind.

This Kid Is Metal AF

I’m not sure what this kid’s intentions were with this Mother’s Day gift, but I’m a little terrified. It might be an innocent mistake, but this sounds like the start of some Game Of Thrones stuff.

Photo credit: polargreen / Reddit
Photo credit: polargreen / Reddit

If the “Rains of Castamere” starts playing at the next family wedding, RUN!

The Truth Hurts

Parents don’t want to admit that they’re basically slaves to their children, but this card isn’t afraid to tell it like it is.

Photo credit: 240240 / Reddit
Photo credit: 240240 / Reddit

You may think that grabbing a beer with your coworkers once a month means you’re still an independent adult, but the rest of the week is spent driving your kids to soccer practice.

At Least You Won’t Notice Which Wrinkles Are Yours

At first, I thought this card has all the right intentions with all the wrong execution. But when you think about it, it’s perfect.

Photo credit: Reddit
Photo credit: Reddit

You’ve already got brownie points for telling your mom she’s pretty. But then you’re tin-foil mirror makes a point without forcing your mom to stare at the bags under her eyes and the wrinkles on her forehead.

This 10-Year-Old Wants You To Get It On

It’s not every day that your fourth-grade student whips you up a love potion to get it on with your husband. Unfortunately, this kid didn’t study up on aphrodisiacs.

Photo credit: Nastycakes / Reddit
Photo credit: Nastycakes / Reddit

Sugar will likely make her and her husband crash quickly. This student should have filled a bag with garlic, beets, and ginseng.

#MealPrep

One four-year-old knows just how hard it is for a parent to do everything they need to in a day, so they tried to help out and pack his dad a lunch.

Photo credit: The_Cat_Downvoter / Reddit
Photo credit: The_Cat_Downvoter / Reddit

I want to critique this lunch, but it’s actually amazing. It checks off three of the four major food groups. And when you’re drinking a beer at 11:30 AM, you can blame it on your kid.

Anything Is A Craft Supply If You Try Hard Enough

Forget all those crayons, sticker books, and glue guns that mom has bought for arts and crafts. Kids will do whatever they want, including using your panty liners as stickers on dad’s card.

Photo credit: @Dempster2000 / Twitter
Photo credit: @Dempster2000 / Twitter

Maybe he’ll be so moved by the homemade card and have an ultra-absorbent pad to wipe his tears.

The Math Checks Out

Getting a coffee mug personalized is like the next step up from birthday cards. Writing out your message on a piece of construction paper is for kids ten and under.

Photo credit: Fakediertybyrd / Reddit
Photo credit: Fakediertybyrd / Reddit

Once you’re older than that, you need to start giving useless gifts alongside a thoughtful message. What this kid didn’t know is that his mom will use this mug to drink wine out of at 8 am.

Not Exactly A Poetry Prodigy

I have to give a shoutout to the teacher who wrote the entire poem. Apparently, they thought that leaving the last word blank wouldn’t be too much of a risk, but they were wrong.

Photo credit: geni91782 / Imgur
Photo credit: geni91782 / Imgur

Maybe the kid loves dairy products, and they are grateful to cows for providing all the best cheeses and milk. At least this poem is all about the positive in life. Kids can go down some dark paths these days in their art!

This Kid Knows Exactly What Adults Want For Christmas

These parents woke up on Christmas morning to these stockings (plastic bags) that their 8-year-old stuffed with presents. At first glance, the items seem hilariously useless, but it’s the perfect adult stocking.

Photo credit: friend_eggs_and_ham / Reddit
Photo credit: friend_eggs_and_ham / Reddit

All that’s missing is a new toothbrush and some socks. All the things you hated receiving as a kid, but need desperately as an adult.

A Little Awkward To Buy Your Parent

This gift is so innocent but so wrong at the same time. Looking back, this user now understands why the store clerk was so weird about selling it to a four-year-old.

Photo credit: jenglasser / Reddit
Photo credit: jenglasser / Reddit

Parents are so selfless that you know this dad used the mug every day only because it was a gift from his daughter.

And Finally, Proof That Dogs Give Better Gifts Than Kids

I think we’re all convinced that kids give the worst gifts, but on the flip side, pets give the best ones. Pet parents are just as deserving of gifts as regular parents.

Photo credit: @serena_jillian / Twitter
Photo credit: @serena_jillian / Twitter

Luna is obviously very thankful that her mom spends top dollar on only the best dog bones. We truly don’t deserve dogs.