The food and beverage industry is cutthroat. Most of the time, your competition is just a step away at a different restaurant so you need to learn to stand out. Maybe it’s promoting specials, or maybe it’s coming up with an incredibly funny sign that will lure customers to your establishment.
Funny marketing has always been effective but it’s not as relevant in the restaurant industry, until now. We gathered up some of the funniest signs that have revolutionized how restaurants market their brand.
This is typical reverse psychology that’s being used here and they’re doing a very good job at it. When someone reads this sign they’re going to want to try to the meatball sandwich for the experience. Look, basically everything can be reviewed online and it adds some intrigue.
There are many restaurants that survive on bad food so having one horrible YELP review about the meatball sub is probably not the worst thing in the world.
No Rhyme Or Reason
Look, we can’t all be these creative geniuses and come up with literary brilliance at the drop of a dime. I think that it’s pretty easy to say that the poetic gene isn’t nestled into this person’s cranium, but they get an ‘A’ for effort.
We can only assume that Shakespeare, Frost, and Bukowski are turning in their graves right now knowing that this is what their art has turned into. With that being said, this doesn’t take away the passion this place obviously has for their bacon and steak.
Some Serious Mommy Issues
We’ve all been there before. You’re working hard on your middle school math equation and you need help with some clarification on the question. Naturally, your instincts kick in and you call for your mother while looking directly at your 30-year-old math teacher who is now mortified.
Not only is this ALWAYS awkward for you and the teacher, but your classmates don’t let the slip-up go un-bullied for at least a few weeks afterward.
Okay, Not Interested
Am I the only one who’s confused about how their grandparents and parents survived without technology? So wait, you’re telling me that I have to actually talk to this person that I’m going to dinner with and don’t have ANY ways to distract myself from the social awkwardness?
Having this sign outside of your restaurant will certainly cut your customer base in half, eliminating anyone who is under the age of 30 because the thought of not being able to text people while they’re on a date will give them social anxiety.
“Doesn’t Matter To Me”
Is it possible to date someone who doesn’t enjoy the same food as you? The easy answer to that is NO. We should also get one thing straight, your significant other who says they “don’t care where we eat” every time is just being selfish.
They’re afraid of rejection and would rather be able to complain about the food and say, “you picked it, not me.” They’re not being easy going, they’re just being selfish.
Can we just talk about the fact that socks and sandals are incredibly convenient? I’m not sure when all this hate started happening, but it needs to stop. There are many days that are too cold for bare feet, but too hot for an enclosed shoe.
The fact that this establishment is willing to give such an uneducated hot take about fashion is not only ignorant, but it’s bad for business. Billions of people, myself included, will be taking our dollars elsewhere.
The Guilt Trip
It’s important that you get people into your store by any means necessary. Who cares if your customers are guilted into coming into your store? The money all looks the same. This sign may come off as desperate, but the truth is that everyone is connected through the power of money.
Both you and the employees at the restaurant rely on each other. So, with that being said, where are you going to go for lunch today?
Words Aren’t Enough
Sometimes the words on a sign just aren’t enough. This restaurant knows that and accompanied those words with a nice little diagram. The fact that this restaurant needs to even put up a sign that tells people to stop flicking, or flipping their tables tells us all we need to know.
This location must be a post-bar hot spot because I don’t see any middle-aged families coming in and flipping tables angrily on a regular basis.
Purr For Your Lunch
Some restaurants have some really weird traditions that are incredibly confusing to understand. Some cafes will knock a dollar off of your coffee if you say please more than four times during your stay at the establishment. Other restaurants will dare you to eat their biggest meal with the stipulation that if you finish it all you don’t have to pay for it.
This pub will knock 10% off of your order if you can meow ten times. That would be one annoying restaurant.
There’s No Grey Area
There is NO good reason to not like bacon. It’s pretty much the most universally enjoyed meat of all time and I can say that with a guarantee. There’s no grey area on this issue, you either like bacon or you’re wrong and should be punished.
In fact, there are some people (probably this restaurant) calling for life in prison for people who don’t enjoy bacon. Of course, I’m kidding, but the fact that you believed me for a second tells you a lot.
It’s A War-Zone Out There
The restaurant industry is cut throat. If you want to have a successful business and be around for a long time you’re going to have to make some enemies along the way. If a new spot opens up down the street and your customer base is flocking to them, it’s up to you to get them back by any means necessary.
If that means that you make a soup that’s based solely on the tears of your competitors then that’s what you have to do.
Someone Woke Up On The Wrong Side Of The Bed
We all have those days when nothing goes right from the moment we exit our beds until the second we return later that night. Everyone should be given 10 days a year that they’re allowed to be miserable and hate the world. It’s very obvious that whoever wrote this sign was using one of their 10 days because this is dark.
They just threw out the daily special while also attacking everyone’s uniqueness which is incredibly harsh.
I’ll Have Your Soup On The Rocks
Let’s be honest, sometimes after a long day at work, it’s a soup kind of day. Other days you get home from work and need some “SOUP.” There are a lot of issues that “soup” is going to cure for you, but chicken noodle won’t.
Chicken noodle won’t cut the edge off your stress. Chicken noodle won’t make you text your ex saying that you miss them, but I can assure you that “soup” will.
This Is Fair
When you go to get fast-food you need to know that you’re going to be getting quantity over quality. No one is going to head over to McDonald’s to get a gourmet burger because gourmet burgers take longer than two minutes to make.
If you want good food, you’re going to have to wait a little bit. If you just want fast food you’re going to have to sacrifice the quality. This restaurant lays it out perfectly for you.
Literally Following Orders
Everyone wants to have a healthy relationship with their boss. You don’t want to be the employee that can’t be trusted to go out and make an enticing sign for passing customers to see.
This employee was just following orders, literally. I think we can come to the conclusion that “playing it safe” on this one probably ended up getting this person fired. In a way, this is a very witty sign so maybe they just got demoted to a dishwasher or something.
Don’t Bring Kids Here
The Karma Cafe sounds like an amazing place to be. First of all, you don’t have to worry about kids because parents aren’t going to risk getting served cold rice and expired beans as a result of their child crying the whole time.
You also won’t have to worry about the grumpy old people who complain about every little thing with their “back in my day” sentiment about how not tipping is actually benefitting the server.
Insta-Foodies Should Wear A Helmet
Instagram has become a striving platform for dog profile and foodies. It’s becoming mainstream for people to literally take a picture of every meal they’re eating that day and it’s exhausting.
Everyone who hasn’t suddenly turned into a food critique and meal photographer is sick and tired of people doing this. We whole-heartedly agree with the concussion protocol so this is a fair warning to wear a helmet if you suddenly have urges to take a picture of your burger.
No Matter What It’s The Same Solution
The quicker you come to realize that there is one solution to every issue, the better and less stressful your life will be. Whether you had a bad day at work, you heard some bad news regarding the death of a family member, or you just found out your best friend is getting married — going out is the only logical solution.
This restaurant’s diagram perfectly tells you how that statement is very true. Going to the local bar will solve all your issues.
But, Wine Not?
This sign is playing on your heart strings. Innocent grapes are giving up their tiny little lives in a vineyard so that you can enjoy that magnificent glass of Merlot. So, how dare you walk into this place without ordering a glass.
You should be thinking about all the sacrifices that have been made in order for you to drink that wine and appreciate it. From a business perspective, the guilt-tripping of wine drinkers is almost bulletproof. It works 100% of the time.
Run For Your Life
You don’t have to risk it. First of all, the pavement looks very wet which means that it’s probably raining and, therefore, you should be inside having a drink regardless. There’s such a thing as seasonal depression, but there’s also weather-dependent depression as well which is why having a few drinks on a rainy day is probably a good idea.
Not only should customers already be seeking shelter to get away from the rain, but the thought that there COULD be bears ahead is terrifying in itself. Think about this sign as giving you a life or death option.
Finally, A Helpful Yelp Review
And Alexa really hit the nail on the head with her comment that she’s probably “too white” for this Thai restaurant. Most Yelp reviews are just people complaining about service. This one is a bit different and possibly helpful.
On the bright side, we know that there’s some really good food being served up here judging by the accolades that they have received over the years. However, don’t come here if you are looking for a big plate of Pad Thai!
I Didn’t Need Convincing, But It Worked
I lose all my willpower when it comes to pizza, but apparently, there are some people out there who can stay strong and still need some convincing. Even if you’re one of those unique human beings, this sign will change your mind right away.
Lion King and pizza is the new Netflix and chill. Just about anything that has to do with The Lion King is bound to suck anyone into their trap. This pizza joint knows what it’s doing!
This Is Why You Can’t Take Cats Anywhere
A lot of me think cats are Satan’s curse on the world, but this bar sign perfectly explains why cats are misunderstood. Cats aren’t trying to break everything we own, it’s just their way of relaxing after a long week of eating and sleeping.
At least you know this bar likely has an endless supply of whiskey. However, if you enjoy a nice tumbler of whiskey after a long day, this might not be the best place to bring your feline friend.
East Coast Represents
It’s not the advertising that I ever thought Biggie Smalls would end up being used for, but it works surprisingly well. The rapper was known for being Notoriously overweight, so Biggie the Piggie isn’t the worst comparison you could make.
A nice lean pork chop with a twice baked potato can be pretty hypnotizing. While this sign might be clever without a doubt, we just hope that it’s somewhere on the East Coast where Notorious B.I.G. called home.
A Good Sense Of Humor
This bar sign found in Mexico shows America just how much the Mexicans know they can party harder. All that Cinco De Mayo stuff they do in America has nothing on Mexico’s year-round party atmosphere.
Why else would every college girl in America migrate there for a week each March? It’s nice to know that some people can still have a good sense of humor even when things aren’t necessarily going their way. This sign must have won the hearts of Hispanics and American alike.
Galentine’s Day Mood
Who needs a partner who eternally loves, supports, and respects you when you have wine? This sign is calling out to all the single millennials who can barely afford rent but can still afford wine at the bar.
Ladies, enjoy it while you can. Soon you’ll reach the age where drinking wine at 4 pm at the bar doesn’t make you look cute, it makes you look like a cougar. But then again, that’s not always a bad thing.
That’s A Call You’ll Want To Answer
Beer is like that person you hooked up with at your friend’s birthday that doesn’t understand it was a one night stand. And your response is always the same.You avoid the annoying texts all week until they call on Friday and you say “hey, it’s the weekend, why not?”
Be honest with yourself, if you got an unexpected call from a number named “beer,” would you answer it? We’re going to go ahead and assume yes.
Dori Speaking The Harsh Truth
Sometimes someone hits you with the stick of truth, and it hurts. When it comes to alcohol and bad decisions, I have roughly the same memory as Dori. Yeah sure, let’s completely disregard the fact the last time I did five Jägerbombs I texted my ex and ate a family size bag of Doritos.
Dori is just pointing out that every time you claim that you’re not drinking again, that’s just you lying to yourself until the next time someone hands you a beer.
What About The Tall People With Low Standards?
This bar sign starts sweet, turns savage, and ends with you standing there wondering why you’re excluded from something you don’t even want to be a part of.
Just because I’m tall doesn’t mean I don’t deserve to have free water like dogs and short people. Justice for tall people! But then again, it’s probably best if you’re not caught on your hands and knees slurping out of that bowl. Just walk inside and have a drink if you’re that thirsty.
We’re All Homer Simpson On The Inside
A lot of us want to think we’re nothing like Homer, but in reality, America loves The Simpsons because it’s eerily relatable. Just think about how many people reading this sign work a meaningless job to get by and who also love coffee, beer, and cake.
This bar knew it had to tap into our deepest desires, and they did it perfectly. The greatest thing about this sign is that you don’t even have to love The Simpsons in order to get it.
Your Phone Is No Longer Your Bestfriend
The world is attached to their phones, but drinking is the one time we really shouldn’t be. Even if you’ve managed to live a life without heartbreak and texting an ex isn’t your biggest fear, there are still so many things that could go wrong.
Like, what if you accidentally texted your mom for that booty call? This bar sign is kind enough to remind us all: glasses up, phone down. Either that or don’t even check your your phone after a night out to save yourself the embarrassment.
I Usually Don’t Like Croutons But…
I’m not the biggest fan of croutons in salads. They are so hard you can’t even pick them up with your fork. But water croutons in whiskey soup is a different story.
This soup of the day sounds like the perfect Friday night dinner to finish off a long workweek. Of course, unless this sign went over your head, they’re referring to H2O croutons as ice cubes, a perfect compliment to any nice glass of whisky.
Flashback to the Poetry Unit in Grade 9 English
In all honesty, this bar sign could have been written by me. If a poem doesn’t rhyme, it doesn’t make much sense in my mind, but I’ll probably still put it down on paper. I still don’t even know how many syllables are supposed to be in a haiku.
I’d go into this bar solely because they probably don’t understand Shakespeare, and I don’t need him on my mind when I’m focused on drinking beer after a long day at the office.
Nobody Exists On Purpose, Except To Get More Tea
What better way to attract a customer to your boutique tea shop than with a boutique reference? David’s Tea is smart enough to know the way to get any millennial into your store is to make a Rick and Morty reference.
Fans of the show love to brag about how only smart people will understand the humor. Typical millennials, it doesn’t take much to get them to fall into your trap.
They Make A Very Good Point
Okay, this sign is spitting some serious truth. I’m going to start basing all my friendships off of how long they can go without a drink. Fact: dogs can last 4-5 days without water, but a cat can last almost two weeks.
Coincidence that one is man’s best friend and the other is plotting to take over the world? I think not. If only you could grab a beer with your pets! It wouldn’t get better than that!
The Only Math That’s Useful In The Real World
In life, basic math is really all you need to know. But what if you start throwing in variables? Will the unknown value of gin and tonics you’ll drink over the night effect when you crack your phone screen?
That’s when it gets confusing, and you have to bring out your phone calculator. Oh, wait, you might not have one by the fifteenth drink. It’s probably for the best that you put your phone away and keep it away after you’ve already texted your ex.
Second Breakfast And A Pint Is The Original Brunch And Mimosas
All those college girls who make fun of the “nerds” in their econ classes have no idea that their Sunday brunch tradition is just a rip off of Hobbit lore.
Hobbits call it second breakfast, but Chelsea from Kappa Beta Phi calls it getting an $8 fruit cup at 11 am after eating two Big Macs at 4 am on the way home from the bar. Oh, and don’t forget the bottomless mimosas! Those are an essential part of any true second breakfast.
This Is A Way Better Gift Than Frankincense
Anyone who knows the story of Jesus’ birth knows that frankincense and myrrh were both awful gifts in comparison to gold. Nowadays, skip the symbolism and give the people what they want. John, Johnny, and Jimmy are the heroes that baby Jesus truly deserved.
Granted, we don’t think that Jesus would particularly think that making fun of the gifts that he received at birth to be all that funny. But then again, what’s life without stepping on a few toes!
Free Beer For Nobody!
You can’t blame this bar failing to get your attention. Most men would only need to read the part about free beer to storm the place. Anyone who finishes reading the sign might just turn an walk away.
Then again, customers love a good joke. This place deserves your business for making you laugh. Who knows, maybe there is still free beer for the people who decided to stop in and have a drink anyway. But then again, bars are stingy establishments, so probably not.
Science For The Win
If alcoholics have one thing in common, they’re all just trying to justify their drinking. This bar sign makes a pretty good argument for it’s okay to chug away.
According to science, a solution is a mixture where one thing combines with another thing to form a brand new thing. So tequila and lime juice mix together to form a margarita. You’re welcome. You don’t have to stop there either. Jack Daniels and Coca Cola is also a nice option as well.